Depression Dancing!!!

disclaimer : gripe

"Red carpet" thats the theme of the party thats currently rocking ISB. gentlemen and ladies from the class of 2009 dressed in their finery, shaking a leg along with the faculty.

But somehow the party made me feel depressed. I went around the dance floor a couple of times and walked back to my room, Its been a long long time since i went into a state of depression so in an ironic way i am enjoying this depression. But what is it that has been preventing me from dancing in the last 3 parties , what is it that has lead to a severe loss of confidence, what is it that is affecting my focus and performance, what is it that is bringing down my energy levels? Several questions but one answer. ;-) Anyways partying dint seem to be the right thing to do when one has so many questions to hunt answer(s) for.

Something else happened today for the first time in a few months, someone walked up to me and said be humble man , you are outgrowing your boots. I have made a conscious effort to stay humble the last couple of years after i received a similar comment a few years back. I was surprised that i have still not succeeded after so much practice and of course i felt very upset. But yes this incident lead to the depression although it was the tipping point.

Our mid terms are scheduled this week, in about 4 -5 days from now , so the folks partying out there are making sure they unwind as much as possible, sad though that i am not able to loosen up :-( :-(

--Badri--