"Madras is the best city in the Universe" I used to say whenever people told me it was hot, there was acute water scarcity or that the autowalas were all crooks. I loved the city and was always proud to be from TamilNadu. In spite of the fact that I dont have words to describe it , TamilNadu is just different.
But today after watching this video
http://bit.ly/7W2hvL
Of an injured cop begging for help and being left unattended by "Ministers" of the state, I am convinced my state has gone to the dogs. Any "human" with some amount of "common sense" would have taken the cop to the nearest hospital in his/her car. The ministers could have also used their influence to arrange for immediate and proper care for the injured. But all they did was call for an ambulance 8 min after seeing the victim in pain and arrange for the victim to be carried to the hospital 20min after they reached the site. WORSE: they said thats the best they could do Fing Morons
"http://bit.ly/78HMXM"
The victiom was a cop, he was attacked by criminals, this man was working for the government, the public, trying to make our lives betters and Ministers whom we voted into power did NOTHING to save this man.
If these two morons are not punished for their FELONY , we can safely conclude that TamilNadu has gone to dogs and is one of the most inhospitable places in the universe.
--Badri--
Disclaimer : Had these flow of thoughts lost night and they sounded good in my head, so wanted to write them down as a story, but as soon as I started writing down the story the thoughts got garbled and this emotional junk alone remained. Read at your own risk!!!
It was surely not love at first sight, I am pretty sure the first time we saw each other we instantly developed a deep hatred for each other. I loathed everything about her , the way she looked the way she treated people, everything.
But slowly things changed , I guess the more you interact with a person the more you start liking them. Its not a liking that comes because you find their traits good, in sync with your expectation but because you know them well enough to ADJUST. I guess thats the magic word, I learnt to ADJUST with her and our relationship improved.
The more time I spent with her, the more I learnt. Nah , she wasnt pedantic, I mean not always, but she had her own unique way of teaching me stuff and I loved it. I loved it cos I was learning and I loved it because I found her form of teaching absorbing.
A few years of association and then cupid's arrows struck. I dont know how it happened. Whenever someone inquired about our relationship I maintained that I just liked hanging out with her and it was nothing serious and I had no plans of settling down. But something changed , I dont know what, but I knew this, that the more time I spent with her the more I started falling for her.
There were others like her who were more beautiful, they even treated me better. They were nicer to me and let me go the way I wanted . She on the other hand used to tease me, irritate me a lot, confuse me, leave me stranded, in spite of all this I loved her. Perhaps I loved her because of all this, I dont know and I dont want to know, the fact is I was in love after a long long time and I was enjoying the feeling. But I was scared.
The previous time I was in love felt great too but sadly it dint last, we are still good friends and it sucks. So I was afraid this one would have an abrupt ending too and we will end up becoming "good friends". Also the last relationship I had ended around the same time I started telling everyone about it without asking her where she was in our relationship. So this time I was silent about my feelings. I dint want anything to disturb the peace I felt, I had only once been in a relationship and I knew fully well that being in love feels way better than being committed.So I wanted to let this feeling linger as long as it could.
Three years ran by and the feeling lingered, I never went past "I loved her" and she never said anything. Also all this while, I never tried to find out how she felt about me, but I presumed she liked me, she got more friendly, she cared more, she showed her frustration when I did things she dint like and I loved that I could frustrate her, her frustrations were beautiful too.
But this time, fate had different plans, even though I maintained silence we got separated, partly because I got attracted, to someone else I thought would be a better match and partly because it wasn't meant to be. Even though I tried to "move on" I rued everyday that I wasn't with her. Slowly the sorrow vanished and was replaced by a void that dint feel anything, dint know what the initial feelings were it just occupied a place in my heart and made me uncomfortable.
9 months after my separation fate arranged for a meeting between us, It was sudden and it was amazing. The moment my eyes saw her, I jumped in joy like a small kid who just received a fire truck(boy kid) as a gift, she just smiled , her most frequently used reaction and the one which I feared the most, for it hid lot more than it revealed. We spent 2 great days together and this time separating ways was easy or so I thought. So we said our good bye, we decided to remain friends and parted ways.
10 hrs after parting ways with her my heartaches, I cant stop thinking about her, I cant stop thinking how happy I felt in her presence, how at peace i was.....
--Badri--
